From: the_dojang-owner@hpwsrt.cup.hp.com To: the_dojang-digest@hpwsrt.cup.hp.com Subject: The_Dojang-Digest V6 #410 Reply-To: the_dojang@hpwsrt.cup.hp.com Errors-To: the_dojang-owner@hpwsrt.cup.hp.com Precedence: The_Dojang-Digest Fri, 20 Aug 1999 Vol 06 : Num 410 In this issue: the_dojang: re: male self defense classes the_dojang: Re: The_Dojang-Digest V6 #408 the_dojang: Re: The_Dojang-Digest V6 #408 the_dojang: Re: driving home tonight. the_dojang: Re: 5 years!!! the_dojang: RE: The_Dojang-Digest V6 #407 the_dojang: Re: Timid and scared Male M.A. Students Re: the_dojang: Re: 5 years!!! the_dojang: Re: Are you successful?? A Perspective the_dojang: The Billy Bully Bag the_dojang: . ========================================================================= The_Dojang, serving the Internet since June 1994. ~725 members strong! Copyright 1994-99: Ray Terry, California Taekwondo, Martial Arts Resource Replying to this message will NOT unsubscribe you. To unsubscribe, send "unsubscribe the_dojang-digest" (no quotes) in the body (top line, left justified) of a plain text e-mail addressed to majordomo@hpwsrt.cup.hp.com. To send e-mail to this list use the_dojang@hpwsrt.cup.hp.com See the Korean Martial Arts (KMA) FAQ and online search the last four years worth of digest issues at http://www.MartialArtsResource.com Pil Seung! Ray Terry, PO Box 110841, Campbell, CA 95011 KMA@MartialArtsResource.com ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Laura Kamienski" Date: Fri, 20 Aug 1999 00:49:27 -0400 Subject: the_dojang: re: male self defense classes <> I recently started a women's sparring class at my dojang. It has been a great success on many levels. One night after a hard bout of sparring matches at a 'regular' class my instructor announced the time for the next women's sparring class since it interferes with the normal schedule. A male co-student asked "Hey, when are we going to have men's sparring?" I being the only female student present replied..."I think we just did!" I am often the only female student btw. The point is that men have never been discriminated against, as a group, based on their sex. I agree there are some timid and less aggressive men in the world. Some of these men might find the macho black belt image a bit intimidating, but in general, they don't need to worry about rape or sexual assault, sexual harassment on the street, or the workplace or at home. Furthermore, men are not presented with images of helpless inefficacy to aspire to. I think that, unlike women, even the most timid male has a whole host of assertive and strong role models to choose from. Women have only recently entered this arena. Boys are taught to fight early on. I don't think that wrestling or other similar contact sports have yet become part of the women's physical education curriculum. One night I was watching my instructor wrestling on the floor with two neighbor boys (around age 8). They were having a great time rough housing and giggling. Their 7 year old sister sat cowering on a chair about 3 feet away holding her doll in a blanket. When I asked her why she didn't join in on the fun, she hid her eyes and said, "oh, no, I can't do THAT." This is an interesting question and I am curious how men deal with the issue of fear and intimidation but I think it's dangerous to assert that there are 'lots of women's' classes and no men's classes. Men have had their own classes for centuries. We've (women) got a lot of catching up to do. Respectfully, Laura lkamiens@ptd.net http://home.switchboard.com/LKamienski ____________________________________________________ "The destination is not the purpose of a journey; death is not the purpose of life." -Thich Nhat Hanh ____________________________________________________ ------------------------------ From: Brett Erwin Date: Fri, 20 Aug 1999 08:22:11 -0500 Subject: the_dojang: Re: The_Dojang-Digest V6 #408 Actually, we can. Relatively cheap. I recently bought a $50 PC-cam and a $10 microphone (and the same for my parents). I can now have a long distance video conference with my parents over the internet (so it's free). All we have to do is set up a video chat room and get after it! >Hi Dennis, nice to hear from you again! Wouldn't it be awesome if we could >do virtual workouts. Oh, how I wish that we each had a huge screen TV in >our homes or dojangs where we could all link up and workout and talk to each >other, a couple times a week. Wouldn't that be sweet now. Think how much we >could share and learn.. - - Brett Erwin Allen, TX ------------------------------ From: Brett Erwin Date: Fri, 20 Aug 1999 08:32:25 -0500 Subject: the_dojang: Re: The_Dojang-Digest V6 #408 >Did you pay this all at once?!? I think it is outrageous that new students >would be allowed to sign, much less enticed to sign a 3 year contract. This >smacks of the old health club abuses. They make a windfall when you quit or >stop showing up. Allowed??? You make it seem like its the school owners fault. If your program is worth it, and you (the instructor) are worth it, and the customers are willing to pay it, then so be it. It's **BUSINESS**. I am not a school owner, but I am one of the chief instructors, so I am part of the product that they buy. Our our school charges upwards of $90/month on a 3 year "black belt program", and that doesn't include testings, tournaments, sparring gear, new uniforms, patches, etc. And we've got nearly 300 students willing to pay this. We just set a school record this week with just under 200 students who tested. We must be doing something right. Oh yeah, it's up to the instructor to keep them from quitting or not showing up. If they quit, then I take it as my personal failure. Brett Erwin Allen, TX ------------------------------ From: Brett Erwin Date: Fri, 20 Aug 1999 08:41:14 -0500 Subject: the_dojang: Re: driving home tonight. WELL DONE!!! You did the right thing. You were able to assess the situation and *THINK* and realize what the quickest, safest escape would be. I know it burns on you, but he probably called you a $@%^@$ and forgot about you 5 minutes later. - - Brett Erwin Allen, TX ------------------------------ From: Brett Erwin Date: Fri, 20 Aug 1999 08:42:25 -0500 Subject: the_dojang: Re: 5 years!!! Hey Ray!!! I've been on your list for about 5 years now!!! Great work in keeping it going! Brett Erwin Allen, TX ------------------------------ From: Chris McKenna Date: Fri, 20 Aug 1999 11:44:54 +0100 Subject: the_dojang: RE: The_Dojang-Digest V6 #407 > > Kim Jones (ladytimberland@yahoo.com)wrote- > > Thanks to all who have said anything, whether on the list or > in private. > You can't hurt my feelings by saying what you believe; I > encourage that > because I say what I think regardless, so of course I respect > you to let > you speak your mind before I blast you. =) But seriously, > anyone who's > said anything, thanks. Kim, hope that your toe is now a better colour! Injuries are hell. I was sidelined for two years with an ACL injury, from competing. I watched my young sister overtake me in the belts ( I was a red belt - i.e. red - red-blackstripe - Black) and become a black belt before me and go to the GTF world champs. in St Louis and win some medals, all whilst i was either in crutches or rehab. I have every sympathy with your toe, and now with my wife who after being kicked in the hand whilst holding the pad for a junior in class now has two broken bones in her left hand. Although she says she will still train, albeit carefully! I was always told in my TKD class to give way to senior rank at all times, its just common curtesey to give someone the room that they need, and plain ignorance if you don't I don't think many people realise the power generated by a proper kicking technique, and after all, watching movie stars(?) getting a reverse turning kick to the head and receive nothing more than a slightly bleeding fat lip (if anything) is NOT quite creating a true picture of MA. On that note does anyone have a favourite - Martial arts movie, that has a decent view of the MA world and fighting in general? Chris MCKENNA GTF Scotland! ------------------------------ From: dbuehrer@denver.carl.org Date: Fri, 20 Aug 1999 07:46:27 -0700 Subject: the_dojang: Re: Timid and scared Male M.A. Students \ From: "Jamaica Power" \ \ I always wonder about timid and scared males. Don't you think martial arts \ is equally hard for them to join? I mean the image of a male black belt is \ pretty strong and can be intimidating even. If they are a timid, gentle, or \ scared soul that never even stepped on an ant well I would think even \ joining a class let alone sparring in class could be a very hard trip for \ them. \ \ Perhaps they even were abused verbally and physically at home, at work, or \ on the playground. But I never hear discussions about this! \ \ Has anybody had experience with a timid new male m.a.? How have you helped \ him overcome his hurdles? There are lots of self-defense classes for women \ but I don't know of any just for men?? Are there some and I just need to \ get up-to-date? I used to know a timid male, and that male was me :) I took a Karate class in 1986 at nearby community college. I did well, mostly because I'm gifted when it comes to things like dancing, MA, etc. However, my timidness and lack of self confidence made sparing very hard for me. That was one of my hurdles. The black belt that taught the first half of the semester, or the GM took over for the second half, didn't have a negative effect on me. It was the interaction with the other students that I had a hard time with, and my own feelings of low self worth. However, after the end of the semester I continued taking classes at the Dojo during the summer. But, my lack of confidence got the better of me and when the next school semester started I used the excuse of lack of money to stop taking Karate. It was about twelve years before my level of self confidence increased to the point where I felt comfortable studying martial arts. I don't know if I can explain the change(s) that took place over those twelve years. It pretty much boils down to personal growth. There were many people that had a positive influence on me. If I could pinpoint what it was about them that influenced me I would say that they were self confident and caring, and not egotistical (as were the instructor and the GM in the class I took). They set a positive example for me, giving me something to strive for. If I could give any advice for helping a timid person (male or female) I would suggest that you lead by example and strive to be the best person a that you can be. If timid MA asks for help I would advise offering it in small doses. People with low self esteem have enough personal standards that they feel they aren't meeting. Try not to add to that load :) If a timid MA is having trouble with something, I suggest showing them what to do, or relating a story of how you handled a similar situation. If you tell them what to do they may feel as if you're judging them, which their low self confidence may not be able to handle. Again, administer small doses :) Praise them when they've learned something. Praise them when they're working hard to learn something (just because you're having a hard time doing something doesn't mean you're failing, it just means that it's very difficult for you). And finally, all your efforts to increase their self confidence them may not help them now. They may not be able to deal with the challenge of martial arts at this point in their life. The most you can hope for, IMHO, is that they will remember you and the example you set and learn from that at some point in their life. - -David Buehrer - -- Supervisor, Database Preparation The UnCover Company mailto:dbuehrer@denver.carl.org - -- - -- "One little smile can fill the room with sunshine." ------------------------------ From: Ray Terry Date: Fri, 20 Aug 1999 07:19:48 -0700 (PDT) Subject: Re: the_dojang: Re: 5 years!!! > Hey Ray!!! > > I've been on your list for about 5 years now!!! > Great work in keeping it going! > > Brett Erwin > Allen, TX And thanks for your active participation during all that time. Ray Terry raymail@hpwsrt.cup.hp.com ------------------------------ From: "Alexander, Stephen (Nexfor)" Date: Fri, 20 Aug 1999 10:30:39 -0400 Subject: the_dojang: Re: Are you successful?? A Perspective I don't think this is exactly what Jamaica had in mind when she started the thread, but this is something that's made me think about the definition of success. One day a very rich father took his son on a trip to the country with the firm purpose of showing him just how poor some people can be. They spent a day and a night on the farm of a very poor family. When they got back from their trip the father asked his son, "How was the trip?" "Very good, Dad!" his son replied. "Did you see how poor people can be?" the father asked. "Yeah!" he responded. "And what did you learn?" the father asked. The son answered, "I saw that we have one dog at home, and they have four. We have a pool that reaches to the middle of the garden, they have a creek that has no end. We have imported lamps in the garden, they have the stars. Our patio reaches to the front yard, and they have a whole horizon." When the little boy was finished, his father was speechless. His son added, "Thanks, Dad, for showing me how poor we are!" Isn't it true that it all depends on the way you look at things? If you have love, friends, family, health, good humor and a positive attitude towards life -- you've got everything! Steve Alexander To win 100 victories in 100 battles is not the highest skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the highest skill. Sun Tzu / Gichin Funakoshi ....... Take your pick ! ------------------------------ From: "Jamaica Power" Date: Fri, 20 Aug 1999 09:28:52 CDT Subject: the_dojang: The Billy Bully Bag So what are your opinions on the Billy Bully Bag for kids for $179.95 from Century? And I'm not just talking about price, either!!!! Have to say it doesn't sit right with me but I sure would like to hear from other instructors that teach kids and some of the parents on the pros and cons. Right now I personally don't have any pros, but I remain open.. Thanks JP _______________________________________________________________ Get Free Email and Do More On The Web. Visit http://www.msn.com ------------------------------ From: Ray Terry Date: Fri, 20 Aug 1999 07:35:52 -0700 (PDT) Subject: the_dojang: . ------------------------------ End of The_Dojang-Digest V6 #410 ******************************** Support the USTU by joining today! US Taekwondo Union, 1 Olympic Plaza, Ste 405, Colorado Spgs, CO 80909 719-578-4632 FAX 719-578-4642 ustutkd1@aol.com http://www.ustu.com ===================================================================== To unsubscribe from this digest, the_dojang-digest, send the command: unsubscribe the_dojang-digest -or- unsubscribe the_dojang-digest your.old@address in the BODY of an email (top line, left justified) addressed to majordomo@hpwsrt.cup.hp.com. Old digest issues are available via ftp://ftp.martialartsresource.com in pub/the_dojang/digests. All digest files have the suffix '.txt' Copyright 1994-99: Ray Terry, Martial Arts Resource, California Taekwondo Standard disclaimers apply.